Been creeping on and catching up with old friends these past two weeks. Interesting to see how much three years changes you, even only two for a few of them. Yet only Chris has his shit together. He showed me some of his photography worked and I was truly impressed..he’s discovered his peace. He still keeps the skating spirit alive that I felt when that was a big part of my life. Everyone else, though, is just about pussy money & weed. I still have the urge to hang out with them and wonder that mindset feels like after being gone for so long. But I know that the fun they’re having now will expire. I must tell myself that. I believe what I’ve accomplished this year, quitting smoking, drinking, changing my circle of friends, raising my grades, learning trombone, making PIP, etc..has set me on a path to success and deep happiness I hadn’t imagined before. The journey is difficult- it would no doubt be easier for me to relax on everything and spend my days and nights getting high and going on adventures. But what I believe now is that I’m setting myself up for a better future with the changes I’ve made and continue to make. When I hear stories about the wild party I missed, the chill spot I won’t get to smoke at, or the thrilling antics I haven’t been a part of, I feel envious and maybe even a bit regretful. But when I hear Ben play his horn, see the ease with which his conducts, and the way he holds Emily’s hand and talks so sweetly about her, I know I have a better gig ready for me if I will just keep hanging on.
(Source: lizzinglemons, via russiancheetos)
